Premium Content:

Lezzon 9: How to get picked up (literally)

DSC_0185It recently dawned on me that I have never actually dated. Having only had two girlfriends in my 31 years, I most certainly have courted, but in both instances I was familiar with the lady before the relationship began.

Truth be told, my only experience with lesbian dating thus far has been via a British publication by the name of Diva. I took a copy on my summer vacation to Spain a few years back and spent the holiday reading out the personal ads with friends. What struck me was the overwhelming number of lesbians who professed to like nights in and out, cats and bushwalking. The percentages were off the Richter.

- Advertisement -

It made me wonder if these interests were in fact some sort of lesbian code. I mean, bushwalking and cats – doesn’t take a genius. However, there were two ads that really struck a chord. The first was a bi-curious woman in her 50s who, like the majority, enjoyed natural landscapes and felines. But her ad conclusion was most peculiar. “Seeking a woman 40-60 with similar interests. Must have own car.” Must have own car? This woman wasn’t so much looking for a life partner as she was a lift.

The second lady who peaked my interest professed to be a fat, unattractive lesbian who liked to sit on the couch and be antisocial. She was seeking the same to have absolutely no fun with whatsoever. GSOH for sure, I thought to myself.

But I digress. Now that I’m back in Australia and flying solo again there seems only two viable ways lesbians can advertise their person: the Pink Sofa and

speed dating. For a short time we also had the female equivalent of Grindr, Qrushr, but that didn’t last long and frankly I’m not surprised. Wanting to be attuned to all things gay I decided to check Qrushr out for myself. Signing up with a pal of mine, we were quite chuffed with our user names, Hello Clitty and Kate Bush. Unfortunately for Bush and Clitty the closest online lesbians were 3500kms away. In Melbourne.

I don’t know why the lesbian App didn’t take off in WA but now I’m left sitting in front of my computer staring at the Sofa. Username? Well, Sadie Spade seems a good place to start.

Sadie Spade

Latest

Health officials estimate one percent of Fiji’s population living with HIV

In January last year the World Health Organisation described it as an "escalating HIV epidemic".

Senegal’s President signs tough new laws against homosexuality

The new legislation double the prison time for people suspected of being homosexual.

World’s largest trans flag unveiled in Brisbane

The Trans Day of Visibility display called for action against the Queensland government's ban on gender affirming healthcare practices.

Marcia Hines, Missy Higgins and the sound of a crosswalk preserved in national archive

Marcia Hines hit 'You' is being added to the national sound registry. See what else is being captured.

Newsletter

Don't miss

Health officials estimate one percent of Fiji’s population living with HIV

In January last year the World Health Organisation described it as an "escalating HIV epidemic".

Senegal’s President signs tough new laws against homosexuality

The new legislation double the prison time for people suspected of being homosexual.

World’s largest trans flag unveiled in Brisbane

The Trans Day of Visibility display called for action against the Queensland government's ban on gender affirming healthcare practices.

Marcia Hines, Missy Higgins and the sound of a crosswalk preserved in national archive

Marcia Hines hit 'You' is being added to the national sound registry. See what else is being captured.

On This Gay Day | The Grim Reaper ad aired for the first time

Australia’s infamous “Grim Reaper” campaign aired on television for...

Health officials estimate one percent of Fiji’s population living with HIV

In January last year the World Health Organisation described it as an "escalating HIV epidemic".

Senegal’s President signs tough new laws against homosexuality

The new legislation double the prison time for people suspected of being homosexual.

World’s largest trans flag unveiled in Brisbane

The Trans Day of Visibility display called for action against the Queensland government's ban on gender affirming healthcare practices.