My story begins in my home country of Pakistan-officially the Islamic Republic of Pakistan; the sixth most populous country in the world and a Commonwealth member. However my country is most notable for its border neighbours Afghanistan and Iran as well as the ongoing territorial dispute with India over the Kashmir region. Located in an area of considerable unrest and turmoil, I was fortunate to be born into a comfortable family with supportive parents and a safe and secure home life in a provincial city near the Afghan border.

Aware of my sexuality from an early age I was discouraged from openly expressing my feelings by a society that actively discriminated against gay people and enforced a 1860s British colonial-era law which prohibited homosexuality, whilst religious courts and Islamic law prescribed the death penalty for acts of sodomy. Once identified as a gay person you are also open to blackmail from police, harassment and imprisonment.

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There are no civil rights laws in Pakistan to prohibit discrimination or harassment on the basis of real or perceived sexual orientation so the majority of gay people remain in the closet. In fact, the current Pakistani government denies that homosexuality exists in the country.

Living as a gay man in a culture that does not accept your sexuality and outright denies that you exist presents many challenges. There are no pubs or clubs that openly accept gay patrons so a majority of gatherings are held in private homes away from the public and the risk of being ‘outed’.

In spite of the homophobia, there are underground networks of gay and lesbian people fighting for recognition and respect in their own country – a prospect that seems no closer now than it was in 1860. Openly gay activists are rare in Pakistan, those that do speak out risk imprisonment, death, public humiliation and beatings – so strong is the anti-gay sentiment amongst the broader community that attacks on gay and lesbian people are often not reported for fear of further retaliations and even those attacks that occur in broad daylight rarely attract police intervention.

My own experiences as a gay man in my country and as the presenter of a popular radio show on the national broadcaster enabled me to speak out about the injustices imposed against gays and lesbians in my country and raised awareness of the plight of these people. Perhaps the most notable broadcast was when my radio show centred on the imprisonment of a lesbian couple who had been living together – their relationship was discovered by their neighbours who reported them to the police, resulting in them both being arrested and jailed. My support for their decision to live together sparked a great deal of public backlash against myself personally and my show. The anti-gay sentiments in the months that followed culminated in a series of personal attacks against me; this was the final straw for my life in Pakistan.

I was living in constant fear for my life, receiving death threats and drawing the attention of extremist members of the community who were looking for a cause to raise their profile and push their own agenda under the guise of support for Islam.

I was accused of misleading the younger generations through my radio broadcasts and turning them away from Islam. I was no longer free to move about in my own city and could not venture out of my house without protection. I certainly could not rely on the police for protection against the homophobic zealots that waged a campaign against me – I was virtually a prisoner in my own home. My employers also pressured me to refrain from expressing my own views on air; my media career was being undermined by the very people who gave me a voice. In this environment of constant fear and oppression I was given the opportunity to come to Australia and leave behind the ongoing torment surrounding me.

My relief at leaving behind such a terrible and potentially life threatening situation in my own country has now been replaced with the regret and fear that I have placed my family in the path of extremists. I may have quite literally dodged a bullet but I am constantly in fear that my brothers, sisters or even my parents may not be so lucky. In the eyes of the people who sought to destroy me, their desire for persecution is simply passed on to my family and for this reason I may never be truly at peace. I escaped to a more secure life but at what price to the people I love?

Now in Perth, I have met very nice gay friends here with whom I enjoy parties and get-togethers. Above all, I love my life here as this nation does not judge anybody for his race, language, colour, religion and sexual orientation and they like me as I am. That is why I cherish my freedom of speech/expression in Australia.

Name withheld

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