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Couch Potato- October #1

Chipper chips!

RIVERS AND LIFE: THE YANGTZE (Tues Oct 6, ABC- 6pm) -I find it particularly ironic, in an Alanis Morrisette fashion, that a series on the ecological importance of diversity in freshwater environments profiles China’s Yangtze River – indeed, this is worth a watch to see how *not* to keep a river alive. The Baiji (Chinese River Dolphin) was rendered extinct in 2007 by the construction of the ‘famed Three Rivers Dam’ trumpeted in this program, and the Yangtze Paddlefish – one of the largest freshwater fish on Earth – has just been declared extinct as of August thanks to overfishing. Not that we’re much better…cough, Barrow Island, cough. Great viewing if you’re in a misanthropic mood…

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ULTIMATE BATTLES: ALEXANDER THE GREAT (Wed Oct 7, History Channel- 4:30pm)
-Everything you ever wanted to know about the famed Macedonian warrior-king who lived from 356-324 BC. Alexander conquered most of the known world at that time, a brutal tyrant and a brilliant, ruthless warrior as well as being a gay man who doted on his lover, Haephastion. He was also the spitting image of Ian Thorpe – and if you think I’m going to risk a lawsuit with a joke about that, you’re nuts.

WHICH SEX AM I? (Mon Oct 12, Bio Channel- 5:30pm)
-Given the appalling homo/intersex phobia currently at large in the global media’s ‘Pull her pants down!’ attitude towards African athlete Caster Semeneya, this documentary about an intersexed child could not be more timely. 12-year old Angel has been raised as a girl, but a routine medical check-up revealed she is genetically male. The program follows Angel’s parents’ attempt to fix a definite gender for their child. Who says they need a fixed one?

Wonky wedges!

THE SEVEN PM PROJECT (Wed Oct 28, Ten-7pm)
– Harmless current-affairs comedy show that is clearly well suited to the blandly affable stylings of host Dave Hughes and producer Rove McManus (what? was Carl Barron busy that week?) Genuinely funny co-host Charlie Pickering is wasted in this program which goes out of its way *not* to offend. Comedy is best when it’s sharp enough to cut, and here it’s been sanded down so it’s safe for kiddies to play with.

Juicy jackets!

GARY UNMARRIED (Thurs Oct 29, Seven-7:30pm) -Don’t get your hopes up, people. In this case, ‘Unmarried’ doesn’t stand for ‘Queer’- rather it’s the latest in a long line of execrable, cookie-cutter Hollywood sitcoms, the ratings success of which is proof to me that a) there is a Hell and b) this sitcom and its cardboard cut-out brethren are probably played in Hell 24-7-365 as a punishment. I didn’t like this show back in the Nineties when it ran after FRIENDS and was called THE SINGLE GUY either. The sole drawcard for this televisual equivalent of smallpox the *very* cute and queer-friendly Jay Mohr, who is funny (when he’s not in this).

OZ (Thurs Oct 29, SBS- 12:15am)
-Even in repeat, this excellent, uncompromising series set in an experimental (strictly controlled numbers of each ethnic/social/gang group) New York State prison called Emerald City (hence ‘Oz’) is brilliant, brutal viewing. Watching his chilling portrayal of neo-Nazi slimeball Schillinger, it’s hard to believe that actor JK Simmons also played the gruffly hilarious J Jonah Jameson in the SPIDERMAN movies and also voices the yellow M & M! The show bridges across not only all manner of violence, but all manner of socio-political commentary as well. Plus it’s also renowned for its typically frank scenes involving often high-profile guest stars, such as Luke Perry, BD Wong and Eric Roberts, who have all gone full frontal in the show. Likewise queer-friendly and very DILF-ish semi-regular Christopher Meloni as Chris Keller, who didn’t let full blown homicidal psychosis stop him from not only whipping not-so-little-Chris out, but having the show’s only real tender moments, with his lover Tobias Beecher (Lee Tergesen).

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