TASTY MASH!

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE: Graham Norton (Sun Feb 6, SBS- 4pm)
Latest episode of the ‘celebrities tracing their ancestry’ series sees the hilariously camp, Gay Irish comedian investigating his descendants (‘something tells me the tree is going to uproot at my branch’) in Eire, and unearthing several skeletons in his closet (which is all he has left in there now that he’s out of it).

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STALE CHIPS!

RIVER MONSTERS (Wed Feb 16, ABC2- 7:30pm)
Reprehensible documentary series following a fisherman as he travels the world’s river systems, intent on catching some famously large fish, regardless that these and other truly huge (all over 10 feet) fish are endangered due to overfishing. What is the human obsession with catching big animals? And can it explain why I am determined to gay-marry SUPERNATURAL’s 6 foot 4 star Jared Padelecki?

JUICY JACKETS!

DEXTER (Mon Feb 21, Eleven- 9:30pm)
One of the show-ponies of the new commercial network Eleven is season 4 of the deliciously dark and dryly deadly drama Dexter. For those of you new to this bloody (in numerous senses of the word) good series, Michael C. Hall (last seen as the Gay Fischer brother, David, in SIX FEET UNDER) plays a Miami-based Forensic Serologist (blood expert) who is THE go-to guy for blood-pattern spatter analysis. What the Miami Forensics department don’t know is that Dexter is so good at reading blood patterns because he makes them on his free time – Dexter is a serial killer who, thanks to his policeman father (gay actor James Remar) has channelled his psychopathic urges so that he only kills other serial killers. Season 4 sees Dexter trying to juggle being a new dad and life with his girlfriend Rita (who is oblivious to his cutlery-draw recreational activities) with the arrival in Miami of a vicious new serial killer who kills people in groups of three and is given the apt name Trinity (Trinity is played by John Lithgow, who fortunately never dons skin-tight black latex like Trinity in THE MATRIX).

SPUDS IN SPACE!

SUPERNATURAL (Mon Feb 21, ELEVEN- 8:30pm)
Last year’s season of the cult series about two hot brothers, Dean (Jensen Ackles) and Sam (Jared Padelecki) who occasionally stop eye-bonking each other (the homoeroticism is strong in this one) long enough to hunt down various ghosts, demons, monsters and assorted bugaboos. The monster-of-the-week plot took a bit of a back seat in the boys’ showroom floor-worthy Impala last year when as a consequence of Sam’s actions, he a] accidentally unleashed The Apocalyptic Horsemen (War, Famine, Pestilence, Death, and probably unofficial Horseman Justin Bieber as well) and b] Set in motion the release of Lucifer from Hell. Whoops! Things are coming to a head now, as the intangible Lucifer (Mark Pellegreno) is constantly tempting Sam to “let him into his body” (I THINK he means to use it as a physical vessel, but this series is so homoerotic I wouldn’t be surprised if he just wanted to ride the Sammy train like every other man on the show seems to want to).