Some people may be wondering what you could possibly be proud of when you acquire HIV. An assumption made by some people, is that people living with HIV (PLHIV) should feel ongoing guilt and shame. You may have heard things along the lines of, ‘PLHIV must live with the consequences of not taking 100% responsibility for their health 100% of the time’ or ‘HIV is an entirely preventable and is the result of risky behaviour’. If we are not careful, PLHIV can fall into the mind trap of judgement and condemnation from others, as well as ourselves, for not being 100% perfect all the time or for experiencing vulnerable moments with unintended health costs, or perhaps simply for choosing to experience desire, pleasure, and love.
So how do PLHIV move away from a place of guilt, judgments, and shame and instead embrace acceptance, dignity and pride? One could identify and focus on the virtues of the HIV journey. As a person living with HIV there are many things I am proud of. For example, I am proud of the fact that I had the courage to go and get tested for HIV. This simple act meant that I was able to get appropriate treatment for HIV and take action that would prevent further HIV transmission to my intimate lovers. Many PLHIV can have pride for taking responsibility for health by getting tested and for being altruistic towards others in subsequent sexual engagements. Every time I have used a condom I have averted a potential HIV transmission. Recalling how many condoms I have used since my HIV diagnosis provides me with an ongoing sense of pride. I am also proud of accepting the natural human condition to err. This facilitates self acceptance of myself and others as I let go of the need to judge others and instead grow understanding and compassion. It also allows me to communicate my choices and consequences to others without needing to present a perfect facade. I often find my self warming to others who communicate what would normally be referred to as mistakes. How we respond to our choices and consequences can often be inspiring, and a source of pride.
The theme for this year’s PRIDE Festival is ‘Homecoming’. A number of PLHIV have left WA to live in other states or overseas. Some PLHIV also experience self imposed social isolation for which they need support. As we get excited about the PRIDE Festival, Fairday and Parade please warmly embrace PLHIV who are returning home and venturing out after some time of isolation and accept them proudly. Happy Pride everyone!
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